Monday, February 19, 2018

Life- it’s not just one appointment after the other!

I decided a few years ago that my life was simply a series of appointments, just like work.
If I was able to simply ‘book things in’ then I could keep my entire life in check.  That works most of the time BUT, not all.  The reason I am typing this blog today is that I am struggling to type anything without miss-firing.  I can’t even eat my lunch without spilling it down the front of me! 

My life is a series of lots of different jobs, from taking Pilates classes, running my IT Company, to managing my commercial property to business consulting work and of course looking after Connor full-time- the 17 year old fantastic teenager who is on the Autism Spectrum.

This morning, I scheduled my life to fit beautifully.  I had to relieve a Pilates class in Epsom from 9-10 and then at 11 I had to be at the Skin specialist for a mole removal at 11.  I had scheduled to be back in the office at 12, where I would have lunch while catching up on my email and writing up some more material on the consulting contract I had as well as what the team had been up to in the morning, I then had a 3pm meeting for Connor which would take the rest of the afternoon.  On the side I am also renovating a bathroom so calls from trades to manage among all of this.
Ahh- scheduling bliss.  I always feel proud when everything just fits!
So I taught the Pilates class at the physio clinic and drove off to my appointment, making my phone calls on the hands free on the way.  Go there early so started doing some emails.  11am rolled around and I walked into the skin clinic.  The Dr looked at the funny thing on my arm and said ‘that looks different to the last time I saw you’, I said yes, it changes a bit.  I then said- so what is it?  The last time I asked him he simply said he did not know.  This time he said – ‘I think it’s a colorless Melanoma’.  Great.  Just what I needed.  I went into the surgical room and they cut it out. He asked me to have a look.  I looked and couldn’t believe that he took such a huge chunk out of my arm for such a small mole.  They bandaged my arm from wrist to elbow and then said- you’ll need Panadol for pain- every 4-6 hours.  Yikes- this is going to ruin my plans!

As I walked out of the clinic, I realized three things.  The first was that my arm was going to be way sorer than I thought, the second was this was going to screw up my perfectly scheduled day as I could barely open the door handle of my car.  But the third thing was really going to throw me- my focus was shot.  I Melanoma.  Great.  I’ve still not gotten over the fact I have bowel polyps growing in me that I will be on a life long removal journey for and now this.  What even is a colorless melanoma?  I know I will have to wait 10 days for the biopsy results, but I’m sure they would not tell me that I have a melanoma unless they were reasonably sure. 

So here I am, looking at my perfectly scheduled day, realizing that even the best of us get slowed down and our day supposedly ‘ruined’ due to looking after our own health.  If anything comes out of this blog it’s to start treating your health as more than just an appointment built into your busy day.  Take the time to reflect and understand why you are even going to the medical appointment- because you have chosen to look after yourself so you can perform for your workplace, your family and your friends, but most importantly for yourself. Give yourself the time after the appointment to re-group and be the best you can be to all in your life, not a mess in your next appointment!

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